Deputy Barney Fife with Goober in tow step out from the cover of the trees. "See Goob, I told you I'd be able to fine 'em. I'm a trained law man. I may only carry one bullet, but they don't call me eagle eye Barney for nothing. 2 Andy says "Barney, you and Goober should have been here about ten minutes ago. Opie had Old Sam hooked." Barney excitedly replies "What happened then?" Andy says "Well...., just as we were reelin' him in, the line broke." Andy looks at Opie "But, We almost had him didn't we son?" Opie answers "We sure did Pa."
As Barney and Goober sit down and start fixing their tackle, Barney smiles and says "That's good Opie." Goober adds "Yeah. As long as I can remember folks have been trying to catch Old Sam." 3 You know, Old Sam is like a symbol around here.
He has been swimming in this lake for many year's now, and people have come to respect him. Kinda like the people who live here in Mayberry. We all know and respect each other. That is what makes this a great town to live in. 4
After they fish for a while Opie says "Pa, Can we eat yet? I'm hungry." Andy says "Alright Opie. Let's see what we got here" Andy opens up the picnic basket. "Let's see, who is up for some of Aunt Bee's fried chicken? Barney? Goober?" Goober answers "Yo." Andy says "Let's see, there is some apple pie, and a Mr. Cookie bar." Barney kinda of embarrassed says "Uh... Andy, that's mine. I asked Aunt bee to put it in there for me." Andy grins and says "She packed you a piece of pie, too." Barney says "I know, but that's for later on today." Barney more boldly says "Well, Ange a slender high spirited person needs a sugar pick-me-up late in the day." Andy smiles and says "Well alright Barney. I was just pickin' at you."
After they eat Andy says "Why don't we walk around a bit? Sorta work off that meal." Barney stands up, yawns and says "Alright. Where do you want to go?" Opie says "Pa? How about showing me that fort you and Barney used to play on." Goober says "What fort?" Andy says "Oh, I've just been telling the boy about a tree house me and Barney built when we were younguns." Barney says "Oh yeah, I remember that. We had allot of fun playing there. I'd like to see it again too." Andy says "Well, let's do it then." Andy turns to Opie and says "But Opie, there's probably not much left of it. That was many years ago."
Andy, Opie, Barney, and Goober start walking towards the old tree house. 5
As they draw closer to the tree house Barney remarks, " Ange, it looks just the way I remember it. It's as if it has been stuck in time just waiting on us to return." Andy looks at Barney and smiles. "Now Barn, don't let your imagination run away with you. I am sure there is a logical explination for it's current condition." "Yeah Barn, a hobo probably lives there," chimes in Goober. Barney nods but doesn't look convinced. "We'll see," is all Barney says as they approach the front door. 6
As they approach the tree house Andy says "Well I'll be, it looks darn near exactly like it did when we were younguns." Barney says "Let's take a look around. What'd ya say Ange?" Andy "Well, be careful up there, you ain't as small as you used to be you might fall through the floor." Andy, Goob, Opie and Barney all laugh. 7
As Barney ducks to walk through the small door, an air of nastalgia hits him and he begins to reminence. He starts walking around (still crouched because of the size of the tree house) feeling along the walls, because of inadequate lighting his hand runs across something odd.....A Still, he breaks out his lighter and looks around with amazement at all the corn liquor being made in his old tree house. Excited Barney raises up smacking is head against the roof of the tree house, Barney yells "Andy get in here!" From outside everyone wonders what could be wrong as Andy wells out, "Whats wrong Barn?" Barney comes running out of the tree house, "Ange, there's a still in there." Andy replies "Do what?" Barney "Thats right, a still" Andy quickly states, "Goob go ahead and take Opie home we got work to do." Goober replies "But Andy?" Andy tells him "Go." 8
After Goob and Opie were gone for about 10 minutes Andy ask Barney "Well ,who do you suppose could be responsible for this?" Barney "I don't know Ange, but it sure gets under my skin knowing that..." "Knowing what?" came a voice from behind them, turning around Andy and Barney saw an old man with a bloodhound and an old double-barrell shotgun. 9
Instinctively, Barney started nervously fidgeting around trying to reach for his revolver. He stops when it dawns on him that he isn't even wearing his uniform. The man orders, "Get out of here, and don't come back!!" Andy says "Now hold on there... What gives you the right to order us around like that? Who are you anyway?" The man says "That's none of your business! Listen I have been making shine, in that tree house, for many years. Now because of you two, I have to move it somewhere else. Now get!!!" Barney nervously says "Now look, you happen to be talking to two officers of the law!"
The man looked surprised and said "Is that so." Barney a little calmer says, "That's right. So, you just better come along peacefully." The man then whistles like he's calling somebody. Just then two men walk up from the side. The man looks at Andy and Barney. "These are my sons." Speaking to his sons he says "Boys, it looks like we got ourselves a couple of revenuers."
The man motions toward the tree house. "They know about the still. We are gonna have to move it. I want you boys to tie them up, and take them to the cabin. Then come back and help me move the still." The man looks at Andy and says "Don't worry, just as soon as we have moved everything to another location, we'll let yall go. Oh, by the way, the name is Sam Jenson." Andy says, "Now look Mr. Jenson you are gonna get your boys in a lot of trouble if you don't stop this right now." Mr. Jenson ignoring him tells his boys to blind fold them on the way. That way they couldn't find their way back after he turned them loose.
After they arrive at the cabin, the men tie Andy and Barney to some chairs, and take off the blindfolds. Then they go back to help their pa. Andy looks at Barney, "We have got to try and get loose. We are not in any danger but we can't let them get away with this." Barney replies, "Maybe Goober will get some help and come back looking for us."10
Back in Mayberry, Goober and Opie head toward Andy's house where Aunt Bee can take over the baby sitting duties. Goober, after having dropped Opie off at his house decided to go over to Floyd's and take a load off.
"Floyd you just wouldn't beleive what I saw today"
"Wh wh whats that Goob?"
"I saw a tree house that Andy and Barney used to play in when they was younguns and you know what, I beleive it looks better now than it did back then"
"I used to have a tree house once.....(Floyd drifts off to his memory)
"Well Im a going bak out there, Andy acted like somethin' was wrong. See ya Floyd."
In his sing-song way Floyd says, "Bye Goober." 11
As Goober makes his way back to the lake he decides to go by Wally's and get a bottle of pop.
Gomer is just finishing up with a customer as Goober walks up. "Hey Goob, what's up," Gomer says in greeting. " I don't have time to talk right now. Just give me a bottle of pop and I'll go." "What's the rush?" asks Gomer "Andy needs me back at the lake. There may be trouble,"says Goober. "Well, it's about closing time anyhow. Hold on a sec and I'll come with you," says Gomer. Goober answers with a hearty "Yo". 12
Back at the cabin Andy and Barney maneuver their chairs to where Andy's and Barney's hands can untie the others ropes. After freeing theselves, Andy tells Barney to get back to the courthouse and bring his revolver.
Goober and Gomer are getting close to the tree house when they hear a racket. They see an old man moving something out of the tree house, a shotgun leaning on the door frame, the man dissapears for a moment and then returns for another load out of the tree house. Goober immediately takes charge of the situation and informs Gomer that, being a North Carolina National Guard veteran, he should be the one to go up there and see what is going on. Gomer says, "Be careful." Goober gives him a serious "Yo!"13
Barney, reaching the courthouse, quickly finds the sherrif's revolver and his own. This is a serious operation, Barney says to himself. I better bring 2 bullets! On his way out to the squad car Otis Campbell comes ambling by, "Get out of the way Otis, I got official police buisness to tend to." "Where ya goin Barn?" "Not now Otis. This is important! Andy may be in trouble!" "What happened?" "Some 'ol codger named Sam Jenson has a still up there by Myer's Lake and him and his 2 sons tied me and Andy up in a cabin and, well I aint got time to explain, I gotta go." Otis says, "Did you say Sam Jenson?" Barney "Yeah something like that." "You better be careful Barney. He's mean as a snake and twice as long 'cept when he's drunk, which is about 90% of the time."
Back at the tree house Goober is making his way toward the tree house and manages to get to the door before the old man returns. Picking up the antique shotgun a voice from behind says, "Who are you?" It was the old man. Goober says "I'm Goober who're you?" "Never you mind who I am. What are you doing here?" "Just out on a walk and I seen this shotgun sittin' here and I thought I would see if anyone was up to this away." 14
Meanwhile, Andy has decided to find the man's sons and follow them to the new location. When Andy spots them he watches undetected. The men finally arrive at a cave hidden in the woods. One man says to the other "Pa had a great idea, hiding the still here. Ain't know body gonna find it." After Andy saw them go into the cave, he figured Barney would be at the cabin waiting for him." Just as Andy draws near the cabin, he hears a noise inside, he approaches cautiously. Andy listens closely there was somebody in the cabin. Since he just left the two sons at the cave, he figures it is the old man. Andy then positions himself behind the door. A few minutes later the door opens and a man starts through it. Andy tackles the man. After Andy pins the man to the porch he gets a look at his face. Andy says, "Barney!!!" Barney breathing hard, just looks up and says, "You wanna let me up Ange?"
Andy helps Barney up and says, "I'm sorry Barn, I didn't know it was you." Barney still mad says, "That's alright it was a natural mistake." He continues, "Us Fifes are tough we can take it." "Are you sure you're alright?" Barney nods his head yes. Andy pats him on the back. Barney stumbles forward. "I'm sorry Barn." "It's okay, It's just fine...."
Andy changing the subject says, "Did you make it to the courthouse?" Barney calms down and says ,"Yes. I got the old roscoe, the old persuader, the old blue steele baby." Andy says, "Good, I managed to follow Mr. Jenson's sons to the new location, for the still. It's a cave in the woods. I've never seen it before, but I marked the trail." Andy continues, "After We catch Old Man Jenson we can go back and bust up the still." Then Andy and Barney start toward the tree house.
Back at the tree house Gomer is wondering what is taking Goober so long. 15
"Gimmie that gun!" Old man Jensen snarled.Goober replied with a snappy "Finders keepers, losers weepers" which infuriated Mr. Jensen who then charged Goober. Goober took off through the woods hollerin' for Andy... 16 Gomer hearing Goober holler, runs up to see what is wrong. He then sees Goober running through the woods with Old man Jenson in hot pursuit.
Gomer, seeing which direction they are heading in, decides to head them off. He runs through a clearing and positions himself. Moments after Goober runs by, Gomer sees Mr. Jenson running not far behind. Just as Mr. Jenson approaches, Gomer leaps out with a flying tackle, throwing him to the ground. The gun flys free. Gomer grabs the gun, and says "Alright mister, hold still, were going wait right here for the Sheriff."
"Shame! Shame! Shame! Scaring my cousin like that." Jenson replies "Well, if that dumb hick, would have just minded his own business." Gomer says "He ain't dumb." Jenson says "What?" Gomer finishes "My cousin Goober, he ain't dumb. He's ugly, but he ain't dumb."
Meanwhile, Goober is still running in the woods. "Andy!! Andy!!" Andy looks at Barney "That sounds like Goober." Andy hollers "Goober over here." Goober comes running over out of breathe trying to tell them what happened. Andy says, "Goober, slow down! Take a deep breath and tell us what's wrong." Goober catches his breath and says, "Andy, that Old man was chasing me. I don't know what happened to him unless he went back to the tree house. I brought Gomer with me and he's still back there." 17
They all run back towards the tree house. As they approach it they hear Gomer say, "Andy, over here!" They look in that direction and see Gomer holding Mr. Jenson. Goober says "I guess that raps this up huh?" Andy says "Well..., not quite. He has two sons running the still for him."
Andy looks at Gomer, seeing he is about the same size as Jenson, gives him an idea. "Gomer, you put on his overalls and cap." 18 "Ah, Andy. I dont know them Jenson boys looked pretty mean?" "Now Gomer, dont worry about a thang just do like I told you and everything will be fine." 19 Gomer replies "But Andy, this ain't gonna work." Andy says, "Gomer, will you just trust me on this?" Gomer reluctantly agrees as he goes off to change he mumbles to himself, "I'll do it, but it ain't a-gonna work. I'll do it, but it ain't a-gonna work."
After Gomer comes back dressed in Mr. Jenson's overalls, Andy looks at him and says, "From a distance, in them clothes, nobody will be able to tell that you're not Jenson."
Gomer noticing Barney was no were to be seen asks Andy where he was. Andy replies, "We put Jenson in the squad car, and Barney is guarding him." Andy says "Alright then, let's get started Gomer. Goober you ready?" Goober answers "Yo!"
They then take off towards the cave, following the trail Andy had marked. As they approach the cave Andy says, "Alright, the cave is just up ahead. Goober you go to the left. I'll go to the right. Gomer you stand over in that clearing and after we get in position you whistle and get their attention."
Andy and Goober position themselves on each side of the cave. Gomer whistles. Inside the cave the men are assembling the still. One looks up and says, "Ted did you hear that?" Ted replies, "Yeah. You stay here, Jim, I'm gonna have a look." As Ted approaches the cave's entrance he sees Gomer standing in the clearing. Some nearby trees are casting a shadow on him, so he can't see him clearly. Turning towards Jim he says "It's okay, Jim. It's just Pa. I think he wants us to come out. He's motioning for me." As Ted walks out of the cave, Andy jumps him from behind. 20
Jim hearing the commotion outside comes running out to see what it is. As he comes out of the cave Goober tackles him from behind. Gomer comes running over to them, carrying Jenson's shotgun and says "Hold it!" Ted and Jim seeing it's not their Pa quit struggling. Jim says, "Ted that ain't Pa." Gomer replies "Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! We sure did fool 'em didn't we Andy."
They rejoin Barney and head to the Courthouse. After locking the Jensons in the cells, Andy sits down behind his desk. Goober says, "That sure was exciting." Gomer says, "Boy, I say it was." Andy says, "Yeah it was. Although, I don't like to see the cells full it sure gives Barney something to be proud of."
As they look over at the cells, Barney is strutting back and forth. "Here at The Rock we have two rules. If you abide by these rules everything will go smoothly."
"Now, Rule No. 1 Obey all rules."
"Rule No.2 Do not write on the walls because it is hard to erase writing from off the walls."
Barney then walks over by Gomer and Goober and sits on the edge of Andy's desk, folds his arms, and proudly says "Well Ange, it looks like everything is safe in Mayberry once again." 21
Barney has a smug look about him, as Andy leans back in his chair to read the copy of the Mayberry Gazette that just arrived. As Andy unfolds it, Barney does a double-take and grows wide-eyed as he sees the front page headlines:
"LOADED MUNITIONS TRUCK HI-JACKED, HEADED TOWARD MAYBERRY"!
Barney's sudden quietness causes Andy to peer over the top of the paper. Seeing Barney in a trance like state, Andy folds back the front page to discover the latest impending disaster and says, "You spoke too soon Barn, you spoke TOOOOO soon!" 22
1. Allan (email@example.com) on Monday, April 2. Jeremy Cranford (firstname.lastname@example.org) on Thursday, April 29, 1999.
3. Old Sam (3) on Thursday, April 29, 1999.
4. Mike Ensminger (Ensmin@bellsouth.net) on Saturday, May 01, 1999.
5. The Tree House (5) on Saturday, May 01, 1999.
6. Christopher MacRaven (email@example.com) on Sunday, May 02, 1999.
7. Scott Burnside (SBurnside@bigfoot.com) on Monday, May 03, 1999.
8. Scott Burnside (SBurnside@bigfoot.com) on Monday, May 03, 1999.
9. Scott Burnside (SBurnside@bigfoot.com) on Monday, May 03, 1999.
10. Sam Jenson (9) on Monday, May 03, 1999.
11. Scott Burnside (SBurnside@bigoot.com) on Monday, May 03, 1999.
12. Christopher MacRaven (firstname.lastname@example.org) on Monday, May 03, 1999.
13. Scott Burnside (SBurnside@bigfoot.com) on Tuesday, May 04, 1999.
14. Scott Burnside (SBurnside@bigfoot.com) on Tuesday, May 04, 1999.
15. Gomer (15) on Tuesday, May 04, 1999.
16. Scott Burnside (SBurnside@bigfoot.com) on Thursday, May 06, 1999.
17. Wally's Garage (17) on Thursday, May 06, 1999.
18. Jubal (z) on Thursday, May 06, 1999.
19. Scott Burnside (SBurnside@bigfoot.com) on Monday, May 10, 1999.
20. The Squad Car (20) on Tuesday, May 18, 1999.
21. Obey all rules!! (Do not write on the walls) on Tuesday, May 18, 1999.
22. Stuey (email@example.com) on Friday, May 21, 1999.